Coin of Life!!!

Hi All..... Another post from the numorous mails i get these days in office. This one which i am posting below is a lengthy one. For a moment, i thought of leaving this alone and press the shift+del buttons. But felt like giving it a try. If not for fun, then atleast for speeding up my reading habit. So i began to read this story. And believe me, i could not wait to read till the end Hope you people also like this. And if u do, do not forget to comment upon the same.

"My mom felt hard to digest my decision and Anand was bit worried about it. It was a bit unexpected for them. But I was rigid in my decision. I love Susma and I wanted to marry her.



I am Suresh. Working as a electronics expert in a TV company. I and my mom live in Vaasan Nagar with so many new houses constructed near by. I got a gang of friends Abdul, Chris, Rahul and one very close to me Anand. We always used to sit in the evening and have a chit chat about different topic we could think about and especially about women. Chris and Rahul are bit jealous of me as there were lots of nice looking young women in my company. But I never had any crush on anyone of them nor neither anyone bothered me. Anand was engaged to Mamtha who also became a close friend of mine While Abdul has a mysterious girl friend whose identity we were yet to resolve. Chris and Rahul are on hunt for one and so with different views we were never short of debate when it comes to part about woman in which occasionally Mamtha too joins in only to leave Anand blushing all the time. Often, I felt quite not interested in these topics. But things changed when Susma arrived.



Susma was a victim of a political riot and her house was burnt down killing her parents and she lost her virginity to the so called protestors. {I could never forgive God for letting such demons live between human}. All those offenders have been punished by law but still the society was bit awkward towards her. Even before she moved into our area, fact about her spread like a fire to everyone. But I, Anand and Mamtha didn’t much care about it and very much frustrated about others coming up with their own assumption



Susma came to the nearby house to mine. She was smart, bold and obviously had a big hatred towards men. She was very outspoken and would go on offensive against people who would comment against her. I was bit admired by her determination and outspoken character as it resembled my father. A day went, one day when I was in standing in queue for getting ticket for electric trian, she came there in a hurry. She stood in another queue and as I was almost near the counter, gaining confidence I called out her and offered my services for helping her out.



“Do I know you?”

“Well….. I am Suresh. Your neighbour.”

“Oh. Did I ask for your help?”

“Not r..really”

“Look if you wish to help, help someone who is very old or who really needs them. Why do you men always on look out for women. Can you mind your own business?”



This was my first conversation with her and I was totally embarrassed. People behind me murmured how rude she was. But once I recovered from it, I couldn’t hide my smile. That evening, it was a topic for my gang to debate on since I failed to notice Chris was on the spot when all these happened. Worst, Mamtha too was in today’s debate.



“Hello Mamtha, I am almost near counter. Shall I get a ticket for you” Chris acted like me before Mamtha.

Everyone started laughing loud.

“What did you expect Suresh? Oh Sweet heart thanks a lot. I will never forgive you” Rahul in a female tone.

“Come on guys. He just tried to help but she was very rude. Why mistaking our maaps because he is very good guy.

He has got some many ticket for some many blondes na” Abdul adding fuel to fire.

“Hey maaps leave it da. May be she disliked anyone pitying her” Anand explained

“Ya right. Think. How could one expect her to be free with some stranger after what all she has gone through” Mamtha always supporting Anand and Me

“Well said Mamtha. Machi next time you call her. Give her your full CV and explain I am suresh working in ….. etc etc” Chris joked yet again



I went home and went early to bed. I wasn’t feeling bad but I was thinking about the event over and over again. Sounds crazy but I actually liked her approach. I just turned to window when I noticed Susma’s house veranda where she was standing and looking at the sky. In the moon light, she looked like an angel to me. But there were some tears in her eyes and I felt bad for her that there were no one for her to wipe it out. Why do you care so much I asked myself? I don’t know why. Silly ain’t I.



Day by Day, I could see many events happening. Susma fights with auto driver, shopkeeper and many more fights like this clearly illustrated that she never hated men to a great extent. The best one was when Chris as usual teasing everyone just for fun teased her she is very rude one and in reply, Chris got a blast of his lifetime which almost required Mamtha to come and calm her down. When I and Anand tried to console her it only increased her rage.



Mamtha became a close friend to her and she gave us verdict surprisingly that she was really a soft person. During my father’s birthday, as usual I and mom went to orphanage to give food and sweets for children there, susma was already there and she had been quite often helping them a lot. By this orphanage, she learned about my contribution to orphanage and came to speak to me about some process in donation and other stuffs which previously I have done. But she was precise to the point and didn’t want to deviate from what she wanted. I just wished I could make her sound normal like others and listen to her speech always.



I got her mail id from Mamtha and started mailing her in name of Rahul. First, she replied in a bold manner that she will go to police. But later I made her realize that through my mails it was not my intention to intrude into her life. But I wished to express my thoughts or feelings to her. I made up stories in email saying that I learned her story from newspaper and her social activities towards orphanage.



In the meantime, in person, I started talking freely to her and made her realize that we guys weren’t as bad as she expected including Chris. She accepted us but she was still rigid in her approach and was never jovial to anyone either. She occasionally put her thoughts to Mamtha and cries in her lap and I used to get all this information from Mamtha.



But as Raghu, I was making lot of progress. I could learn that she was in prisoner of her own thoughts. Initially society made her feel ill and still she had the same feeling. Slowly I made her assumption was wrong and we both debated a lot when it comes to the Men. Soon Rahul became her close friend and the one thing which I hid from her was Rahul’s identity. I would justify myself saying that if she comes to know about me, she will come directly to me and slap me in my face. For a long time, I got a just a smile reply for this but later after some time I got a replying saying that I am not a woman of such type. I know I was making a lot more progress as Rahul more than I wanted. But I wanted to continue. Don’t know why.



Now as Suresh too, I was able to speak with her frankly. She started sharing information to me about her friend Rahul. I felt very happy to see a change in attitude. I started sending her gift on days like friendship day in name of Rahul. First I got strict mail saying no but later I started getting thanks mail for that.



Susma started going out with our gang especially four of us me, Susma, Anand and Mamtha. Whenever Anand and Mamtha moved out for privacy, I would take my opportunity to debate with her and end like a clown before her. She even laughed whole heartedly which made me sleepless that night. Chris and Rahul made fun of me going out with Susma. Abdul from his experience hinted that there was more that beneath the eyes in my relationship. I couldn’t contradict them. For instance, when Susma was showing me a gift send by Rahul (me of course), I started feeling jealous of Rahul. Because, one day when I offered her one, she didn’t accept it and when I argued with her, she neatly explained that you aren’t as close as Rahul and Rahul has understood her a lot better than me.



I got mixed feelings when heading back home. I was happy and the same time jealous. I realized now. I have fallen for her. Once she went for a camp for a week, I missed her a lot. My mom inquired whether I was fine or not. My friends too had no clue but I got an hundred watts smile back after she was back. I was in love with her. I wanted to make sure my mom and my friend understood my feelings before I propose to her. I was right this time



My Mom was terrified. She refused immediately. But slowly I spoke with her and wanted to know why she didn’t approve my love. Two main reasons, she was concerned about the society which she felt might talk about me, Susma and our children in future. I spoke with my mom and made her clear that my society is only her and Susma and I don’t care about anyone else. Another was Susma’s offensive nature. Basically my mom knows very well that I am bit coward {I was bit embarrassed by this but it is the truth} and Susma wouldn’t suit me. I made an arrangement and invited Susma home for a lunch and intentionally I left in between saying that I had work. In evening, my mom was very happy that I had made the right choice and I know I can count on my mom and Susma. I guess conversation between them worked out pretty well.



Next was my gang. Everyone was not so surprised because they were bit suspicious about me. Anand was concerned about me and pointed out some hurdles in future I would encounter while Rahul making fun in between. I firmly stated I was ready for it and Abdul tapped on my shoulder for it. But Chris all of sudden asked Abdul to stop it. He pointed out that if I had loved Susma out of pity, it is not a true love and she will not be happy about it. I know this kind of question will rise but frankly I never expected this from Chris. If I would have loved her out of pity, then I couldn’t say I cannot live without thinking of her. She rather impressed me in all her character which resembled my father. And I don’t care about her past and I only care whether she is ready for a relationship and if she will accept me or not.



The Day I chose to propose was on my birthday and miraculously hers was the next day. I chose to be on defensive. I wanted to propose to her not as Suresh but as Rahul. I mailed her that I would like to meet her with timing and venue giving her a hint that what it could be. I also sent her some roses in the name of Rahul. Next day, I went to see her. She wished me for my Birthday. She was enjoying the fragrance of the roses and for a moment, I couldn’t distinguish between both her face and roses. As expected, she said she had an appointment this evening and unexpectedly she asked me to accompany her.



We travelled in electric train. I was bit nervous and she was surprised that I hardly spoke. When we reached the place, she informed me all about the Rahul’s mail and hinted that Rahul is going to propose. I instantly asked her what was in her mind. She just replied that she is going to say no. I was shocked. She said she wasn’t ready for a relationship both physically and mentally. I was bit silent for a moment. Heart broken, speechless and it was like world would be still. I left the place to get her some water but when I turned back. She was looking even more beautiful to me. Every refusal she made, every fight she fought with me made me to love her more and more. I thought that today might not be my day but I won’t give up on her so easily. She noticed me seeing her and nodded her head cutely in posture asking what. I just nodded nothing and turned away with a smile…



We waited a long time but Rahul never came or I should say he didn’t have the courage to come out…..











----------------------------------------------- Part one -------------------------------------------------









It wasn’t a life I would have expected. But sudden turn of event ruined my life and my dreams. I had become puppet for people’s joke, teasing and pity. I don’t want any of them. I just want to lead a normal life. After all that has happened, my heart was always filled with pain. I hated all the men. I felt ashamed for going out long time. Whenever I go out, I could feel only men laughing at me, teasing me and I just want to end my life instead of this miserable life



But I changed my mind. I decided that I will leave among these demons and I will prove them, that I can still lead a normal life. Court case got over and those rascals got some years of imprisonment. Is it all for those who had brutally ruined my life? What kind of society is this?



I decided to move to a different place. From my father’s friend, I got a house at Vaasan street. As I moved in, I noticed couple of people chatting and smiling. I could see a woman of my age too in that group equally chatting and laughing. I couldn’t help looking at her desperately. I went into the house and arranged everything and wanted to sleep. But I couldn’t. What did I do to deserve this?



Next day, I guess I overslept. I had to start for the office. But while moving towards the street, I could feel most of the eyes were upon me murmuring. I felt hurt again. It is just like a jinx which I could never run away from. Wherever I go, my past is still hurts me. What wrong did I do? There was a temple with few women. When I reached temple to worship, all stepped to opposite side. I felt like crying so I just ran away from temple to railway station. I felt like there was no one to console me. No one to even speak to me. Frustrated I stood in the line when I heard some one calling my name.

Gosh it has been quite a long since some one called my name. My heart pumped fast.

I could see a young man there in a queue offering me help. He was one of the guys standing in the gang earlier



He looked like a nice guy but for some reason, my frustration got better of me and I spoke to him in rude manner. He left bit disappointed I guess. An old man behind me asked “My Dear that young man was just ready to help you right. If you didn’t like it, you could have politely refused it instead of shouting at him right? It is not easier in these days to get someone to help you voluntarily.” I agreed.



I was thinking about it all day and I felt sorry for him. I only thought I could apologize to him. But while heading home, I saw the same gang. They were laughing a lot. I saw the young man who offered me help coming to the spot. I overheard their conversation. His name was Suresh. That woman was Mamtha. These idiots Chris and Rahul are bitter trash. There was one guy Anand always supporting Mamtha. I should warn Mamtha about this guy. How dare this Abdul called me rude. What does he knows about me. Well at least Mamtha spoke in favor of me. To my surprise, Suresh spoke nothing and he returned to home.



I felt very bad. I went to veranda. It’s as if no one is there for me in the world. Those who want to turn my life into hell are only visible to me. Even if someone comes to help me, fate doesn’t allow them. If only there was some one for me. If only, my mom and dad were alive. I couldn’t stop my tears. Then I realized I am standing in veranda in middle of night and went in.



My desperation turned into frustration. An auto driver made comment about my past when I questioned him for over charging. I got mad and blasted him with words. With same intensity, I blasted a shopkeeper too. Then Chris became prey of my fury. Mamtha cooled me but when Anand came I got even more frustrated but failed to notice Suresh.

I went inside and Mamtha followed me. She consoled me and told about Chris was just a funny guy who passes comment but has no intention of hurting anyone. I fell in her laps and cried a lot and she patted me without asking a word. Unknowingly, I have found a good friend to share my feelings



Soon I came to know about her and her entire gang. When I warned about Anand to her, Mamtha laughed and told that she was engaged to him and he had no other go then to say yes to whatever she say. Well inside me, I felt that I could have got a patner like her. I was very much interested in Suresh. He seemed to be a soft character and he was also very much interested in orphanage. He lost his father while he was doing his college. So he gave up his aspiration for higher studies in US and was very supportive to his mother. Listening to his story, I developed a great deal of respect to him.



At orphanage, I met him and I asked him some clarification regarding some formalities in contribution to orphanage. He was jovial, nice and caring. He tried to make topic more interesting but I wasn’t ready for it. One day, I got a mail from a person calling himself as Rahul. I feared that he might be stalking me and threatened him that I will go to police. But soon he explained himself and I got little satisfied thought still suspicious of him. We debated a night long through mail and I stopped feeling lonely now a days thanks to Suresh, Rahul and Mamtha.



I started coming out my barrier especially because of Rahul’s inspirational words and due to Suresh soft approach towards me. Both never felt any pity or sad for me. Instead they both were ready to accept me as I was. I slowly moved into their gang and got introduced to all. I was still hard on Chris for teasing me earlier before Suresh but later whenever I was down, Chris and Rahul would make some fun to cheer me up. And then there was mysterious Abdul, a man always talks less but respected me a lot. Anand always came to my home in search of Mamtha. It seemed like he cannot live without seeing her. Suresh always came with me whenever I asked. Usually when I go alone in bus, some rascal deliberately stand near me but once I came with Suresh, The way Suresh saw them they realized I was not alone and went away. I started feeling some what secured in my life after a very long time



Rahul sometimes in mail touched my heart. But I could find he was deliberately trying to change my attitude. He started sending me flowers which I didn’t like. May be because my personal liking towards Suresh. But I thought those feeling I should not have. I am not a kind of woman deserved a person like Suresh. I felt very bad. One day, I followed Suresh without his knowledge and found him buying some gift. I felt bit down. Make be he had bought for his girl friend. But to my surprise, I found out same gift as parcel to me from Rahul.



I got suspicious and I asked Mamtha about Suresh. She also accepted that Suresh was very much interested in knowing about her. I felt bit of joy after a long time. I hugged Mamtha and begged her to uncover the mystery. We thought of following up with the courier but found out it was fake. It was not couriered at all except for the fact it had courier cover. That night we bought were hiding near our veranda when we found Suresh placing a parcel in my post box. I still couldn’t believe my eyes. Mamtha made some sound and Suresh got scared that he might be discovered ran into his house. We both laughed all the night and I asked Mamtha to help me out all the way



Soon afterwards, I started smiling a lot. I used to go to temple with Mamtha. People yes they were still murmuring but who cares here comes my man Suresh with Anand. We went out and as agreed already Mamtha pulled out Anand in name of privacy and I was sitting and listening to what all he saying to impress. Poor chap he doesn’t know that he has already impressed me. But I always corned him at the end of conversation and he would be like a clown and I was laughing as I was in heaven



To get him more confused, I started saying to him more about Rahul and liked his gifts a lot. To make him more crossed, I refused to get his gifts explaining that Rahul is closer to her than him. Suresh left fuming as a steam engine to home but later using Mamtha’s help I stole his gift which I refused to get. It was really touching portrait and I kept in secretly in my room.



But things took a twist when Suresh invited me to his home. I was very scared that his mom wouldn’t like me. And I was right his mom didn’t like me. As soon as Suresh had left home due to urgent work, his mom came hard on me but I was not ready to give up so easily I pushed aside her arguments for her astonishment. At last she had tears in her eyes, I was bit moved. She told that her whole world was lost her Suresh’s father died. But she is still living because of Suresh and she will die if Suresh leaves him. I was bit moved by her words. I was happy now that Suresh loved me but I don’t want him to leave his mother behind. I told her that I will move out of her son’s life. His mom was shocked. I justified her that I know even more than her how much paining it would be if someone would have lost their loved ones and I started crying. His mom knew very well that I was talking about my parents. Unexpected, she took me onto her lap and patted me. I felt like I had got my mother back



Then we chatted a long time and she said no matter how much problem arises that I would be her daughter in law. I was very happy and got her promise not to convey this to Suresh. I was down to tears that evening when I heard Mamtha saying that Suresh only cares for my decision to accept him or not about anything else. For the first time, after my parents, for someone, my decision was matters most. Even Mamtha had tears in my eyes, she took my face in her hand and told all your troubles and suffering are about to end.



It was Suresh’s birthday but day before in name of Rahul, he said he wanted to meet me and propose to me. I was excited. But still there is one thing. How come always men play on life of women. For a change at least today I will play with this sweet stupid. I called Suresh and wished him and asked him to come with me to meet Rahul. He was nervous all the way and I couldn’t control laughing at him and somehow I control. Later I told him that I am going to say no to Rahul. He was disappointed and went to get water. Now I don’t know whether I did the right thing but I could see he was still looking at me and I realize this is one big idiot who will not give up on me easily. He turned aside with a smile which I liked to watch always.



I intentionally made him to wait till it was late then we were going in train. It was almost 11:55pm. Five mins for my birthday. I called him and he turned to me. For first time, I was nervous and also feeling shy. But I know if I don’t say it neither does this idiot will.



“I want to tell you something as a gift for your Birthday”

“And what is that…” Suresh puzzled

“I love you” I closed my eyes..



When I opened my eyes. He was still in shock and it was 12:00am now.

“Well now. As your birthday is over…”I slapped him

“this is for Rahul” I started laughing at him



Suresh was speechless. I could see astonishment, happiness everything in his eyes

“Say something stupid” I was very impatient

“I I …… Happy Birthday to you Susma”

Train stopped at our station and he started running.

I too chased him hitting all the way with my hand bag

“Stupid I wasn’t asking that”……



We both knew. No matter how far he runs, he is my prisoner for his life time.